The Question Curious Minds Want to Know: Did They Tell Us We Couldn’t Have Kids?

In short? No, they didn’t tell us that. And we didn’t ask. At the time, that felt okay. But as the years rolled by, naturally, the wondering crept in.

This is my story—my side of it, anyway. Seth would probably tell you something different. But for me, this journey is all about healing, self-growth, and God’s perfect timing.

The Thought of Kids

About five years into our marriage, after moving to the USA and finally feeling settled in a new rhythm, a thought whispered its way into my mind: Do I even want kids?

Like many of you, I grew up with a mental checklist that my parents and society seemed to have created for me—get a degree, maybe a master’s, get married, have kids, then live happily ever after (or at least live). I laugh at the idea now, but this checklist quietly guided my steps for so long. It wasn’t until I began building my business that I finally started to question everything.

Moments of Realization

One random morning, while listening to my favorite podcast and making breakfast, the hosts began talking about trauma and its impact—even on how we run our businesses. Their words struck a deep chord, and before I knew it, I was sitting on the kitchen floor, feeling the warmth of the wood beneath me, tears streaming down my face as soft light filtered through the giant tree outside. Right there, in that quiet moment, I felt it—a realization that something much bigger than myself had been holding me back.

You see, I had a younger brother who passed away when he was just three years old. That loss marked me in ways I didn’t fully understand for years. I thought I’d moved on, but deep down, I knew I hadn’t truly healed. That chapter of my story mingled with my memories of growing up in a third-world country where security was fleeting at best. Despite the beauty around us, you’d hear stories of violence, even witness it up close—like seeing someone shot while waiting at a red light. It was only years later that I learned this was called multi-layered trauma. Those compounded experiences shaped my worldview, subtly influencing every decision—even our journey toward wanting children.

Trusting God’s Timing

Two things can exist at once. The years that followed weren’t easy, yet at the same time, they were. If there’s one constant I’ve felt all my life, it’s the peace of God that surpasses understanding. I was happy, yes. I felt peace, yes. But along with that peace, there was also questioning, countless conversations with God, and the ticking of time weighing heavily on my heart.

Nearing 40 and still without a clear answer, I finally decided to let it rest in God’s hands. It wasn’t an easy decision—balancing hope with surrender took strength. Seth once told me, “If we’re meant to have a baby, God will put that desire in our hearts first.” And we believed that—that if God intended for us to have a child, the desire would come from a place of love and purpose, not from expectations or a need to fill a void. This belief anchored us through the uncertainty, letting us release the burden of answers and let faith guide us.

A Gift in His Timing

At 41, the unexpected happened. After years of peeling back layers, healing, and praying for clarity, I found myself in a place of wanting. And right when I truly prayed for a baby, I discovered I was already pregnant.

Just the other day, my OB/GYN smiled and said, “You got pregnant really fast.” I couldn’t help but smile back. In my heart, I knew God had said, It’s time.

This story is a journey of trauma and healing, of questioning and trusting, of surrender and growth. And when the time was right, God sent us a gift beyond any checklist—a gift born not from expectations but from love.